I’m late! I’m late!

I’ve had a White Rabbit kind of a day today. I got up at 7.45am, and have found myself trotting round the house all day in a semi-agitated fashion, doing an endless cycle of chores and keeping small children happy. I sat down once, for about 10 minutes, and ate a sandwich. Which was nice. I also found myself popping a “clean” jumper straight back into the washer again for the next cycle, as in the intervening 5 minutes between me getting it out and coming back to deal with it, the cat had actually hopped into the washbasket and widdled on it. I kid ye not.

It got to the children’s bedtime, and I was beginning to feel extremely stressed. As if I’ve a mountain of housework and chores to do, and I’m wading through mud backwards.

I’m not quite sure what to make of feeling overwhelmed and out of control. I thought I was going to feel more “sorted” and in control, what with the whole not drinking thing. I thought I’d have oodles of time literally coming out of my ears. I’ve been thinking about it briefly (since I properly sat down, at about 9pm). It’s possible that the feeling of having SO much to do is a consequence of having done so little over the last few years. When I say little, I’ve still been running round like a headless chicken during the day, but in a disorganised, hungover way, and then burying my head in a bucket of wine in the evening to cope with the fact I’d too much on my plate. This was not a very effective strategy, it turns out.

So, I think my panicky feelings today are due to the dawning realisation that I have an awful lot to do. Clearing out, cleaning, organising, cleansing my life. However, I am now reminding myself, I have time. Plenty of time, and energy, and I will climb that mountain.

On another note, the stress level I was experiencing at about 7pm would usually have resulted in my opening and glugging down a bottle of wine. Tonight, I used a combination of the following instead:

  • Hot chocolate with a (rather large) dash of cayenne pepper. Kapowwwww!!!!!
  • An episode of Dave Gorman’s Modern Life is Goodish.
  • Working as a team with the hubby to get the biggest log EVER into the woodburner, and watching it go up in glorious flames.

I’m pleased to report that this combo worked very well. I’m now relaxed, I can still type (just), and I won’t feel rough and panic-stricken tomorrow morning on the school run.

Try it!

Red xx

 

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17 thoughts on “I’m late! I’m late!”

  1. Hi red – I know exactly what you mean. I have so much cleaning/ de cluttering to do and should have all this time to do it but I’m soooo bad at it – and will put it off at all costs. I’ll get there one day. Also v tired at the mo – so just taking care of myself and drinking way too much luxury hot choc – and eating plenty of left over Xmas Chocs!!! All helps with the cravings. Def going to try hot choc with cayenne. Actually had a particularly spicy Virgin Mary at the weekend. Was awesome because I had to sip it – just like a wine – actually I used to glug those. Maybe just like a strong whiskey. On another note I still have v stressy moments – partic with the kids and I keep thinking – I’m supposed to be all calm zen and serene now I’m sober. But actually when I reflect on those moments properly i am way calmer than previously – I’m not reaching for the bottle straight after them – so no hangover the next morning which means the stressy moments are far fewer the next day. What a waffle!! Anyway one step at a time – we’re doing this red – and we’re not going to let another damn new year situation get in our way! Hehe. All the best. Love SFM

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    1. Hey SFM – I never thought of a nice spicy Virgin Mary; I’ll be trying that next weekend! Can thoroughly recommend cayenne in the hot choc. Good to hear am not alone with the mountain of stuff. You’re so right, we need to cut ourselves a bit of slack for a while. Still very tired too – when do we get our energy??? Red xx

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  2. Red, I’m good thanks (from your last post). Sundays can be tough as I often drive back to London (where I work during the week), so some Sundays spent figuring out last safe drinking time. No problems on the journey this am as haven’t touched a drop for over a week. I am buoyed by your wise words.

    J

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Justonemore – I really hope your week in the big smoke is a good one. All that travelling must be tough. I too have found myself calculating whether I’m safe to drive the next morning. Scary really. Lovely not to have to do that anymore. Red xx

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      1. Thank you for asking, I am day 13, started New Years Day. I had some long stretches last year, the longest being 82 days then I slipped back in to old ways and could only manage runs of 20 or 30. Keeping trying though, have a good day x

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