Well folks. I’m here to ‘fess up to you, I had a big fat f*cking failure at being sober last night. I’m so ashamed, I actually considered not blogging about it, and trying to cover it up. But then, what’s the point of this blog, unless I’m truthful here?
We took our little family up to another town to stay with friends – the kids played together in the afternoon, and the grownups had a delicious meal once the kidlets were asleep. I made it through the afternoon till 5pm, when I was offered a “real” drink. I declined, and my friends were utterly horrified. I downplayed things, saying “oh I’m thinking of having a year off the booze; my consumption was creeping up”. With hindsight, I should have been brutally honest, as I doubt they’d have tried talking me into drinking if they’d been aware of the full extent of the problem. They convinced me that I couldn’t possibly be sober on NYE, or celebrate properly without a drink. They were so crestfallen when I said I wasn’t drinking, I felt I’d be disappointing them and spoiling their night. Plus, honestly, I really really wanted a drink. And so began the first of many many drinks; G&T, white wine, red wine, champagne, more champagne, more G&T. We all got battered, and ended up dancing/moshing round the living room to music at full blast, falling into bed at 4am, and then getting up at 8am with the five children, the adults all feeling like death. We were so drunk, and it seemed like so much fun at the time. But even through the drinking, when I felt relaxed and fairly invincible, a part of me still realised it was a mistake, and just after midnight I felt huge, huge regret that I was so drunk.
So here I am. Sitting on the sofa, looking and feeling as rough as a bears arse. But with renewed determination to succeed in being free from the booze in 2016. This is damned well going to be my year of feeling amazing.
Wishing anyone reading this a very happy New Year, and if you’re thinking of stopping drinking, well then let’s do this thing!!